Jane Anderson | Growth Strategist

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How to Talk About Yourself Without Bragging

Putting yourself in your content can sometimes feel egotistical. But it’s a vital part of engaging content creation. Here’s how to talk about yourself without bragging.

Many years ago, in the 90s, I had a music teacher and his first name was Tom. He was a beautiful pianist and was often asked to play at important events and in amazing venues. In fact, around that time a mutual friend asked him to come and play at her wedding which was to be held at the Stamford Plaza (the most elite and luxurious hotel in Brisbane at the time).

Tom had gone to the hotel a bit early and made his way down to the gym to put in a little time on the treadmill. After a while a lovely African-American woman got on the treadmill next to him. They soon struck up a conversation. During the course of the conversation she asked him what he was there for, and he told her he was playing the piano for a friend’s wedding. Soon they were both done working out, and they headed on their way.

Later that night, Tom was standing near the front of the hotel after the wedding when a caravan of cars with police escorts and paparazzi pulled up in front of the hotel. The woman from the hotel gym got out of the car. Tom immediately recognised her – it was Macy Gray – one of the most famous musicians at the time.

She started to make her way into the hotel followed by her large entourage, including photographers and screaming fans when Ms Gray spotted Tom standing nearby. She immediately called out in amongst the chaos and (to his great astonishment) said, ‘Hey, Tom! How was your gig?!’

Why is this such a wonderful story? Because Macy Gray had just played at a stadium with over 50,000 fans. Yet, she was humble and aware enough to make her contact with Tom all about him.

How to stay humble in your content (or how to talk about yourself without bragging)

One of the things that many people struggle with when creating content, is how to put themselves in their content and still stay humble. Many want to share their successes and wins with their community (and they should) but worry about bragging or coming across as egotistical.

In fact, that intuition is right. Usually the people who struggle with this worry have excellent interpersonal skills. They recognise that putting their accomplishments in their content could look like they were just trying to draw attention to themselves. And they worry it could come across as self-serving.

But it doesn’t have to work that way. Here’s how to put yourself in your content without bragging.

Reframe the Issue

The best way to combat the appearance of bragging is to shift the attention from yourself to the problem you want to solve and who needs it solved.. In other words, you reframe the issue to why what you do matters rather than why you are so  great.

Let’s imagine you’re in a business etiquette role and you’ve been asked to present at an influential conference. Rather than putting up a post that says, ‘On my way to present at this conference, so excited!’, instead focus on why the conference itself is important.

You could say, ‘Women face more challenges than men getting their ideas heard at work. It’s more important than ever that we make our voices heard so we are able to make a difference.’ Then you can turn this back to yourself and say, ‘I’m incredibly grateful to speak about getting your voice heard at this Women in Finance conference today, and to work with 300 female leaders in an industry going through major change post Royal Commission. There is no more important time than now for their voices to be heard to lead change in the industry’.

You are still sharing your accomplishment and your success, but you are doing it in a way that highlights the message and the audience rather than yourself.

Shine the spotlight

Another way to look at it is the spotlight model (or we could even call it ‘the Macy Gray model’). When you are successful or great things are happening to you, you already have a spotlight shining on you. You’ve created your brand and your platform and draw that success and spotlight to you. So, now it is your role to shine the light on the message, or even on to someone else.

That is exactly what Macy Gray did. She was already in the spotlight, she didn’t need to draw more attention to herself. And by turning the light on Tom, she gave him a chance to shine. And, of course, it didn’t dim her own light at all.

3 Steps to Writing Humble Content



  1. Value. Why does what you do matter?

  2. Relevance. Why did it matter in this context?

  3. Impact. What did you do?

Creating content that doesn’t appear self-serving, egotistical or like bragging is the goal. But if your content hits that sweet spot where value, relevance and impact meet, you will be doing just that.

Tell your audience why it matters (because women haven’t had a voice in the workplace), why it’s relevant (there’s a conference dealing with this issue) and only then what impact you had (you’re presenting there).

That's how to talk about yourself without bragging.

Humble leaders are the leaders of tomorrow

I wrote about humble leadership last year because it is a vital topic in today’s business world. Humility is essential to leadership and to building your brand. Humility connects us with others at a human level. It creates an atmosphere of trust, respect and equality. And it sets up an environment where everyone and every business can succeed.

‘The difference between a good leader and a great leader is humility.’ – Jim Collins

Now that you’ve found success, it is essential to lead others with humility, shining the spotlight on their own successes and achievements.

How do you talk about yourself without bragging?